Did you know that you can navigate the posts by swiping left and right?

The long lull of things.

08 Sep 2020 . category: personal .
#lull #covid #work #stateofthings

Wow, it’s been a long time since I last made an entry. A whole slew of things popped up from February to now, September. Here’s a recap:

  • COVID-19,
  • Kobe Bryant died in a helicopter accident,
  • Black Lives Matter Movement,
  • Murder hornets?,
  • $1,200 stimulus check,
  • Eye injections and surgery,
  • Existential crisis

There’s definitely more I can add to that list, but so far, these things have really weighed down on me. It’s hard to be motivated within the lull. There are dark thoughts that fill my head, and it just lingers there. It’s hard to look forward to anything. I feel inadequate at everything I do: work, hobbies, and the like. It just seems like something is lacking. There’s that dread that anything I do will amount to nothing. Is there anything I’m really good at? What can I do alleviate this sinking feeling? How can I live a meaningful and fulfilling life? ¯_(ツ)_/¯

Despite these feelings, I’m still thankful that I’m employed in these trying times. I can contribute to something that’s beyond me. I just know that I can do more, and I just got to find what.